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Episode Guide: Series Two
Note: The reference to RDS in the Changed Scenes section refers to the page no. of the Rising Damp Scripts book.
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Related pages: The Story of the Series - Script Excerpts - Photos & Stills - Video Clips
 

Permissive Society  -  Food Glorious Food  -  A Body Like Mine  -  Moonlight And Roses

The Perfect Gentleman  -  Last Of The Big Spenders  -  Things That Go Bump In The Night





 
Title:
Permissive Society

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale,
Frances de la Tour, Don Warrington.

With: George A. Cooper as Mr. Cooper.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 7th November 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
Alan and Rigsby have fiance troubles.

Scene Guide:
 
- Philip has fixed up Alan on a blind date for the evening, a friend of Philip's girlfriend. Alan busies himself finding his old unused bubble baths and scented soaps to use in the bath. Rigsby enters and is asked if there's enough hot water for a bath. Rigsby tells Alan not to hog the bathroom and wonders if Alan should use his rabbit-shaped bar of scented soap, as he's had it for such a long time. He jokes at Alan's inexperience of women, but is embarrassed when he insists he does know where the erogenous zones are - somewhere near the equator, Rigsby insists.
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- In the hallway, Rigsby hears Miss Jones sobbing and enters her room to try to comfort her.
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- She tells him, without naming names, that someone she loved (actually Philip) has rejected her. She tells Rigsby of her suicidal thoughts, but Rigsby talks her out of it. Remembering Alan's description of the erogenous zones, Rigsby starts to surreptitiously blow in Miss Jones' ear, but she only thinks there's a draft. Rigsby offers to stay the night with Ruth to comfort her, but she says she has already taken a sleeping tablet and will soon be asleep. Rigsby then leaves, and kicks the cat in anger as he does so.
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- Later, Philip and Alan return from their double date. Philip is furious that Alan suggested they play Scrabble when they arrived at the girls' flat. He gets Alan to admit that he has never known a woman intimately, and Alan asks Philip how old he was when he lost his virginity. In reply to Philip's answer of 'his 14th birthday', Alan says all he got for his 14th was a bike.
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- The next day, Rigsby asks Alan how the previous evening went. Alan lies that it was one to remember and starts to give Rigsby advice on wooing Miss Jones, for example by using a few French phrases. Later, Philip tells Alan this could be his big chance with Miss Jones, while she is vulnerable. He comes to the conclusion that Alan is afraid of women, so Alan goes to Miss Jones' room in his dressing gown, just to prove him wrong.
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- Miss Jones is asleep however, and just as he is about to leave, Rigsby enters, so Alan dives into the wardrobe. Rigsby wakes up Miss Jones and starts to tell her his true feelings for her, plus a few French phrases, culminating in 'respondez sil-vous plait'. Alan's dreesing-gown cord is jammed in the wardrobe door and tries to pull it in. Rigsby sees it slowly disappearing and Ruth jokes she keeps a man in there. She flings the door open and is shocked to see Alan standing there. In a flash, Alan pretends to be sleepwalking and leaves the room snoring.
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- The next morning, Rigsby rushes up to Alan's room to beat him up, but Alan admits nothing happened, and that nothing has happened with any other woman either. Just then, the father of Alan's girlfriend Sandra Cooper enters, to find out why his daughter is upset. Rigsby, however, takes offence at Mr. Cooper's accusations, not least that Rigsby was Alan's father, and throws him out. They jeer at him through the window as he returns to his car, only to see him return with his two strapping sons. Rigsby and Alan frantically try to lock and bolt the door to the room before the brothers arrive.
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Production Notes:
- This episode was creator Eric Chappell's favourite episode of Rising Damp.

Watch This Episode in Full

Script Excerpt:
- "Oh, those erogenous zones."



 
Title:
Food Glorious Food

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale,
Frances de la Tour, Don Warrington.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 14th November 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
Philip wagers Rigsby to fast for 48 hours.

Scene Guide:
 
- Rigsby rushes into Alan and Philip's room, with Vienna in his arms. He has heard Miss Jones rattling her charity's collecting tin, and is desperate to avoid her, as he has no money. Alan is incredulous that Rigsby is actually trying to avoid Miss Jones for once in his life. He insists that Rigsby is the most uncharitable person he knows, but Rigsby replies that it is he who breaks the ice on the bird table every winter (although he says they always wait until he's washing the car before they repay him the way only birds know how). He hears Miss Jones' feet on the stairs and hides behind the curtain. She soon spots him and he has to put something resembling money into her collecting tin, for which Ruth gives thanks by pinning a badge onto Rigsby's shirt. Alan is disgusted to hear Ruth say that some people in the street pretend not to have any money, even when they're carrying full shopping bags. But when Ruth pushes the charity tin in his direction, he hasn't got any money on him either. When Ruth leaves, Rigsby quickly pulls the badge pin out, as it has gone through his skin. Philip enters just in time to hear Rigsby say about having to be black in order to get any charity nowadays, and that the African people should be thankful for all that 'white man' did for them out there. Philip argues that it was a paradise before the whites arrived. Rigsby then tells Alan about the African belief in reincarnation, and their refusal to eat certain foods, in case it was someone they knew. He also says his battalion went without food for a whole week during their time in Africa, but again Philip doesn't believe him, and challenges Rigsby to fast for forty-eight hours, with a prize of £5 if he makes it. Rigsby snaps up the challenge, and Philip sets off to empty Rigsby's cupboards.
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- Later that day, Alan is sitting in Rigsby's room, to keep an eye on his landlord and make sure he doesn't cheat. Philip enters and says he can only drink water, but Rigsby objects to the fluoride content. Rigsby insists his willpower will pull him through, and Philip relates the story of his great uncle, whose willpower allowed him to go without food altogether. This gives Rigsby inspiration, until Philip tells him his great uncle died soon after.
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- Next morning, Vienna's miaows tell Rigsby he's hungry, but the cat food has been confiscated as well. Ruth enters with some leftover fish for Vienna, unaware that Rigsby is fasting. He distracts her by complimenting her on her figure, while he takes the dish out of her hand. After she has left, Rigsby sits at the table, about to tuck in, when Philip enters and takes the dish off him. He winds Rigsby up that the little white bits on his fingernails are a sure sign of vitamin deficiency and will probably lead to scurvy, and leaves. - Later, Rigsby is on the stairs when he can smell food cooking in Miss Jones' room.
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- He enters, but she is not there. The food in the oven is too hot, however, so he pockets a couple of eggs and picks one of Ruth's apples off the table, but Ruth enters and tells him they are made of wax, just after he has taken a bite. Rigsby jokes with Miss Jones and accidentally breaks the eggs in his pocket.
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- Rigsby goes in to see Alan, who is eating again. He tries to get Alan to clandestinely leave food outside Rigsby's door, in exchange for half of his prize money, but Alan is unsure.
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- Later, Philip leaves a plate outside Rigsby's room, full of the week's leftovers and the food which has gone off. Rigsby opens his door and spots it, thinking Alan has agreed to his plan of earlier in the day.
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- Next morning, Rigsby has won his bet, and is soon in the boys' room to collect his £5 from Philip. Ruth enters soon after, with a button she found in her collecting tin, which appears to have come from Rigsby's cardigan. Philip tells Ruth of Rigsby's fast and takes the money from him, thinking he's done it for famine relief. As he tucks in to a celebratory fry-up, Philip reminds Rigsby to return the plate which contained all the mouldy food. Rigsby suddenly feels rather ill, and leaves hurriedly.
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Changed Scenes:
- Rigsby simply declines Alan's suggestion of watching TV to take his mind off his hunger, but in the original script they sit watching the yoga, a chocolate bar commercial and a cookery programme (RDS: p.160).

Watch This Episode in Full

Script Excerpt:
- "...If they put a spade through a worm, they think they've cut granny in half."

Bloopers:
- Rigsby picks up Vienna with the words "There's a good girl", then in the next sentence refers to him, correctly, as 'he'.



 




 
Title:
Body Like Mine

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale,
Frances de la Tour, Don Warrington.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 21st November 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
A fitness craze sweeps the household.

Scene Guide:
 
- Miss Jones is in leotard, doing exercises and skipping with a rope. She dives for her cardigan when Rigsby enters to invite her down to his room to watch TV and indulge in potted meat sandwiches. Miss Jones declines his offer, as she says she must keep fit, claiming she has been neglecting her body. Rigsby poo-poos the fitness craze that's going round, offering himself as an example that it's not needed. Miss Jones disagrees that he is fit and healthy, so Rigsby puts a kitchen chair in front of Ruth and proceeds to raise it by holding one of its legs. He manages it, just, and keeps it aloft until he starts wheezing and going dizzy. Watch video.
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- Meanwhile, in Alan and Philip's room, Alan is in a tracksuit and madly lifting a bar with weights. However, the only difference he has so far noticed is that his arms are getting longer. When Rigsby enters the room, mid-lift, he calls Alan 'Strang the Terrible', and asks him what he thinks he's playing at. He says Alan is not made of the right stuff to build up a muscular body, and that he gets tired brushing his hair. Rigsby suggests Alan should go out and play sport, such as football. This prompts Rigsby to recall his prowess as a footballer and his thoughts on today's game, compared to 'the good old days'. Rigsby then boasts he has perfect reflexes and an 'almost feline grace'. The boys compare him to his layabout moggy Vienna. Rigsby defends his cat by demonstrating Vienna's reflexes. He holds the cat feet up and drops him, expecting him to turn in mid-air, as cats do. Vienna doesn't. He gives a thud, a painful miaow and scuttles off downstairs. As the cat leaves, Miss Jones enters with a stuck jam jar. Alan tries to get the lid off and fails, as does Rigsby, and only Philip is actually strong enough to unscrew the lid.
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- Later, Alan is setting up Philip's weights in Rigsby's room. He fails to lift the weights, and instead picks up the chest expanders. After nearly dislocating his shoulder with them, he moves onto the hand-held squeeze grips, but he nearly loses consciousness after a few reps. Rigsby insists he is fit, and only needs the weights to keep trim, then admits he was jealous when Philip removed Miss Jones' jam jar lid and thinks he could gain her attention if he were fitter. He finishes off with 'a few' press-ups against the kitchen table, but collapses after one and a half. Philip enters to see if Rigsby is watching the cricket, but he isn't. Alan says it's because he doesn't like to see England lose. Talk then turns to Mohammed Ali, and Rigsby insists he only wins because he talks them into submission. Again, Rigsby says he was good at boxing, and retrieves a pair of gloves from the kitchen cupboard. Philip challenges him to a match, and Rigsby agrees. Meanwhile, Alan has been given the gloves and has been told by Rigsby to surprise him with a punch, as proof that his reflexes are sharp and he can avoid it. He doesn't, and Rigsby is knocked out cold across the settee.
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- Just before the fight, Rigsby learns from Alan that Philip was an African championship boxer, and Rigsby thinks fast to try to get out of the fight, including jumping in the air so that Philip might punch 'below the belt'.
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- Rigsby defiantly enters Philip's room, but is taken aback when he sees Philip knocking seven bells out of a training 'heavy bag' suspended from the ceiling. Rigsby warns Philip that he could be dangerous 'when the red mists are up' and sets off to Miss Jones' room, to see if her intervention could stop the duel.
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- She, however, can't wait for the fight, and says she'll go out that evening with the winner. This puts things in a different light for Rigsby, and gives him a new determination. And so, the fight is on.
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- Rigsby's room is transformed, by means of tying a piece of string onto various parts of the furniture, into a boxing ring. Rigsby emerges, wearing turn-of-the-century vest and shorts, and struggles to get his dressing gown off over his gloves. Round One lasts about thirty seconds, and involves Rigsby claiming Philip trod on his foot and Rigsby ringing the bell himself. Alan throws a bucket of water over him to cool him down, not that he's worked up a sweat. Round Two is over even quicker, as Philip takes a dive and throws himself at Rigsby's glove, pretending to be 'out for the count'.
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- In the evening, Philip admits to Alan that he didn't wish to rekindle Ruth's flame for him by letting her take him out as the winner. Rigsby, however, thinks he won fair and square and veritably bounces into the room, clad in evening suit, ready for his night out. In his enthusiasm he picks up Philip's dumb-bell weights - and promptly locks his back up after putting them down again. Ruth enters, is shocked to see Rigsby doubled up, and drags Philip out after all.
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Production Notes:
- Rigsby says he was brilliant at football and "could have been another Tommy Lawton". In reality, Leonard Rossiter was brilliant at football, and Tommy Lawton (an Everton star player) was his footballing hero.
- The events inside the 'boxing ring' were completely improvised, lead by Leonard.
Script Excerpt:
- "The only thing you're going to develop is a hernia."



 
 
Title:
Moonlight And Roses

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale,
Frances de la Tour, Don Warrington.

With: Gay Rose as Brenda; Robin Parkinson as Desmond.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 28th November 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
Ruth falls in love and moves out.

Scene Guide:  
- Ruth is at the front door, locked in a passionate embrace with Desmond, her fiance. He works in the poetry section at the local library and is busy trying some on her.
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- Alan is in his room, watching them through binoculars, until Rigsby enters. He is looking for Ruth and remarks on her recent change of mood - now much happier and content - and Rigsby is convinced she has finally fallen for him. As Philip pours him a cup of tea, Rigsby catches sight of Ruth and Desmond out of the window and sets off downstairs, ready for a fight.
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- Alan and Philip try to change his mind on the stairs by saying his name is Desmond, and making out that he is probably gay and is therefore not a threat to Miss Jones. Just then, Miss Jones appears on the landing, walking on air and singing a romantic song. Rigsby reverts to Plan A and his mission to 'sort out' Desmond.
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- Next night, Alan is watching Ruth and Desmond again, when he notices her beau has gone down on one knee and proposes to her. - Within minutes, she is in the boys' room, showing off her engagement ring. They decide not to tell Rigsby as he enters and Ruth leaves. He tells Alan and Philip what he is going to do to Desmond, namely - to give him a fat lip. They suggest Rigsby should express his love for Ruth, by saying 'the three little words', but Rigsby can't even bring himself to say them in front of Alan and Philip. Alan suggests he should recite some poetry, but Rigsby is only versed in 'The Charge Of The Light Brigade'. Philip gives him a few phrases to try. They are the same phrases he and Alan have overheard Desmond uttering.
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- Rigsby enters Miss Jones' room later with a bunch of flowers, freshly picked from the park. Her room is already filled with flowers - from Desmond. He tries the phrases on her, but they sound too familiar, and she accuses Rigsby of being a voyeur.
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- Next morning, Rigsby enters Ruth's room to apologise, but finds her things are packed. Alan follows him in and untactfully asks him if a friend of his can have the room. Rigsby is determined to make one final effort to hang onto Miss Jones. Just then, Desmond arrives to pick up Ruth's cases. Rigsby throws Alan out and sets about telling Desmond about Ruth's 'excessive drinking' and 'erratic behaviour', and what might happen if she 'went into his library and started pulling all the books off the shelves in a drunken rage', etc., etc. Desmond, suitably shocked, runs out of the house.
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- That afternoon, Alan brings his friend Brenda in to look at the room. As he goes off to put the kettle on, Rigsby enters and introduces himself. Taken in by her buxom figure and youth, he welcomes her with open arms - almost literally. They are sharing a joke when Ruth returns, unable to find Desmond. Ruth is visibly upset and, after Brenda leaves, Rigsby tries his chance at saying 'the three little words', but Desmond appears before he can do so. Overcome with love for her, Desmond tells Ruth they will conquer her 'drink problem' together. Puzzled, Ruth wants an explanation, but Rigsby tries to back out of the room unnoticed.
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- The next day, Alan and Philip are feeling sorry for Rigsby, saying he will need time to get over the loss of his love. But Rigsby is busy moving in on Brenda downstairs. He is interested to learn she is a model. He is even more interested when she tells him she is an artists' nude model at the local college. Rigsby suddenly declares his hobby is painting.
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- Meanwhile, Ruth has returned briefly to say goodbye to Alan and Philip, but not Rigsby, after he embarrassed her earlier. They get her to change her mind, so she goes down to his room.
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- She hears his voice coming from her old room, however, and enters to find him chatting up Brenda with the same phrases Desmond used on her. Outraged, she chases him out of the room and down the stairs.
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Changed Scenes:
- In the scene where Alan and Philip persuade Rigsby to tell Ruth he loves her, the original script includes Alan reading out Rigsby's horoscope (RDS: p.192).
- The original script ends with Rigsby reciting the romantic phrases to Ruth, with her telling him to get out and his flowers being thrown back at him. Compare with final scene above (RDS: p.195).
Script Excerpt:
- "I think I'd rather give him a fat lip."

Production Notes:
- This episode effectively wrote Frances out for the rest of the series, as a delay in writing and filming meant the rest of the episodes conflicted with her confirmed theatre performances.
- Gay Rose was brought in to replace Frances, but no-one knew how long for. Frances made it back for Series Three.




 
Title:
The Perfect Gentleman

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale, Don Warrington.

With:
Henry McGee as Seymour.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 5th December 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
A conman, Seymour, preys on Rigsby's gullibility.

Scene Guide:
 
- Rigsby is in his room polishing a pair of shoes, when Alan enters. He complains about the bathroom being constantly occupied by the new tenant, a financial consultant called Seymour. It is clear Rigsby won't have a word said against Seymour, as he shows breeding. The conversation turns to class, and after telling Alan he's 'common', Rigsby tells him his own grandfather was the illegitimate son of royalty. Philip enters with the same complaint about Seymour, and that he has not repaid him a loan of £5. While denying he is showing Seymour favouritism, Seymour enters and thanks Rigsby for shining his shoes for him, then leaves with them. Philip asks Rigsby if he's seen any rent from the new tenant, and Rigsby admits that he hasn't. Alan and Philip are now convinced Seymour is a conman, but Rigsby goes off to collect his overdue rent from Seymour, just to prove them wrong.
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- He knocks and enters Seymour's room, where Seymour is getting ready to go out. At the mention of rent, he changes the subject, buttering Rigsby up with talk of inviting him to stay at his manor and of Rigsby joining the golf club. Rigsby brings up the subject of rent again, as he leaves, and Seymour pretends he has left his cheque book at the office.
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- Back in Alan and Philip's room, Alan is enjoying his victory over Rigsby, having come away from his meeting with Seymour minus the rent, as Alan knew he would. Philip suddenly says he has lost his wallet, and Seymour is automtically prime suspect. Alan suggests searching Seymour's room for it, but Rigsby says no. Philip then suggests calling the police, and Rigsby is even more put out at that suggestion, so the three set off to search Seymour's belongings.
- However, while the three are in the room Seymour returns, but understands when he is unofficially named the prime suspect in the theft of Philip's wallet. He insists Alan frisks him, but Alan finds nothing. Seymour then frisks Alan, and produces the wallet.
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- Next morning, Seymour is in his room cutting the frayed ends off his shirt sleeves, when he hears banging on the landing. As he opens the door, a golf ball flies past his ear. Rigsby is practising, although he admits to having hit the cat twice. Seymour eggs Rigsby on by saying he will soon be able to join him and the mayor as part of their foursome on the golf course. At the mention of rent, Seymour actually produces the pound notes, and Rigsby tucks them into his purse. As Rigsby leaves the room, however, Seymour has slyly taken the purse from Rigsby's pocket.
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- Rigsby goes to see Philip where they discuss the possibility of Alan really being the thief. Philip is adamant that he isn't. Alan returns, and is aware that they have been talking about him. Rigsby tries to calm him down and feels in his pocket for his money purse. When he realises it is gone, he sets about Alan, but Philip makes him see sense, and that he couldn't have taken it. Philip goes off to catch Seymour out, once and for all.
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- When Rigsby returns to his own room, Seymour is in there, eyeing up his porcelain figures. Seymour tells Rigsby he has bought his shares for him. He had apparently told Rigsby there is oil in the Pennines, waiting to be tapped. He suggests Rigsby should do some entertaining, now that he's going up in the world.
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- Back in the boys' room, Alan is in a bad mood, thinking that Philip is going to be forever suspicious from now on. Philip follows him onto the landing as Alan goes off in a huff. Philip removes a £5 note from his wallet and places it on the floor of the landing as bait for Seymour, then closes the door to wait. But it is Rigsby who appears and bends to pick up the money, quickly putting his foot on it as Philip dashes out of his room. Philip claims ownership but Rigsby says he must keep it until someone claims it, unless Philip happens to know the security number on it, which Philip promptly reels off. He explains to Rigsby what he is doing, but Rigsby says Alan would keep it and go off to the Chinese take-away with it. Seymour returns and spies the money, but Alan follows him up the stairs, so Seymour stands on the note while pretending to be out of breath. Alan apologises for the events of the previous night, but Seymour says Alan has an honest face. When Alan has gone, Seymour picks up the note and goes to his room. Fresh from his compliment, Alan is happy and suggests a Chinese take-away. Philip notices the money is gone, and Rigsby gives Philip an 'I told you so' look.
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- The next day, Rigsby has put on a huge spread, in anticipation of the mayor's visit. Seymour is impressed, but says there must be champagne. He convinces Rigsby to give him £30 and offers to go and buy it. Rigsby gives him the money from a money belt he has taken to wearing in light of recent events. Seymour helps Rigsby to tuck his shirt back in, but when he has left, Seymour has swiped the money belt as well.
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- He rushes back to his room, and puts his suitcase on the landing, hoping to slip out unnoticed. Philip catches him and asks for the £5 he is owed. When Seymour obliges, Philip checks the security number on the note. It is the £5 he laid as bait the previous day.
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- Rigsby has now donned his best suit and is trying to keep the cat off the sandwiches. There is a knock at the door, but it is Alan and Philip, not the mayor. They break the news to Rigsby that Seymour has left, and give him back his purse and money belt, but without most of the money. Rigsby kicks himself for being so gullible, while Alan and Philip tuck into the food on the table.
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Production Notes:
- Eric suggested Henry McGee for the part of Seymour after he had played a leading character in 'The Spanish Dancers', Eric's first TV credit, in 1971.
Script Excerpt:
- "I'm not common! What makes you think I'm common?"



 




 
Title:
Last Of The Big Spenders

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale, Don Warrington.

With:
Gay Rose as Brenda; Robert Gillespie as Gas Man;
Campbell Singer as Mr. Flint; Ronnie Brody as Charlie.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 12th December 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
Rigsby buys new furniture to impress Brenda.

Scene Guide:
 
- Rigsby has bought some new furniture, including a leopardskin sofa, a rubber bubble seat, a brass tea trolley and a new lamp. Alan enters his room and asks to borrow money for new textbooks, but Rigsby only lets him put his hands down the back of an old chair, as he thinks there's a couple of 50ps down there. While Alan is up-ended on the seat, Brenda enters and Alan, embarrassed, pretends he has just mended the chair, and hurriedly leaves. Rigsby proudly shows off his new purchases to Brenda, and invites her out sometime. Brenda thinks he means tonight, and also thinks he means for a slap-up meal. Rigsby fails to talk her out of it and is left to prepare for an expensive night out.
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- Alan returns to his room and asks Philip if he can borrow some money to take Brenda out (not for textbooks, as he told Rigsby). Philip refuses, as he says Alan is wasting his time with Brenda because she is experienced and he is not. During their argument Rigsby walks in and joins in on Philip's side of the argument. Alan storms out and Rigsby sets about asking Philip to borrow some money instead, giving the excuse it is so he can go and see his white-haired old mother. Philip is taken in and gives Rigsby the money, when suddenly Brenda walks in wearing her best dress and asks Rigsby if it will be suitable for their dinner date. Philip snatches the money back. Left alone in the room, Rigsby empties the gas meter, and does the same in his own room.
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- No sooner has he done this than there is a knock at the door - it is the man from the gas board, come to disconnect his supply after unpaid bills. Rigsby quickly brings out the sympathy vote in the worker with stories about having 'trench foot' from Anzio and shrapnel, and the gas man changes his mind. Just as he is shaking Rigsby's hand, however, the linings in Rigsby's pockets give way under the weight of all the change from the meters and loose change falls from his trouser bottoms and all over the floor.
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- That evening, Brenda calls in on Rigsby, ready for their night out, but Rigsby makes up a story about Vienna being seriously ill. Not one to miss a chance of intimacy, however, Rigsby invites Brenda to dine in his room. She agrees, but goes off to change into something less formal. Rigsby, too, dons his smoking jacket, sprays air freshener, and finds some romantic music on the radio. When the knock on the door comes, though, it is Mr. Flint and Charlie - bailiffs, come to repossess Rigsby's new furniture. As the two men start to take an inventory of the items to be removed, Rigsby desperately tries to persuade them to at least wait until after his date with Brenda.
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- As a last straw, Rigsby rushes to see Philip and pleads with him to bail him out, but Philip refuses to help. By now, Brenda has returned to Rigsby's room. He has suddenly decided it would be a better idea if they did go out, but the bailiffs start to remove items around Rigsby and Brenda as they sit on the settee. First the lamp and radio goes, then the tea trolley, then the cushions and glasses. Brenda realises what's going on and storms out.
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- She calls on Alan and Philip and they go off to the pub.
- Rigsby is left on his own with hardly any furniture and even less money. Alan calls in to see Rigsby and laugh at his latest round of bad luck. He invites his landlord with them to the pub, but Rigsby says he's broke. Alan turns the tables on Rigsby by suggesting he feels down the back of the chairs for some loose change, just as Rigsby told Alan to do earlier. In the process, Rigsby gets his hand stuck down the side of the hire purchase settee just as the bailiffs enter. Unable to remove him, Mr. Flint and Charlie carry out the settee, with Rigsby attached.
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Production Notes:
- For the scene in which Rigsby's pockets empty small change all over the floor, the money was held in boxes in Rigsby's pockets, with small holes in the lining of each trouser pocket. At the right time, Leonard turned the boxes so that the money could flow through the holes and down his legs onto the floor. Click here to read the scene's co-star Robert Gillespie discuss this trick in more detail.
Script Excerpt:
- "I'm not just your landlord, I'm a friend and counsellor".



 
 
Title:
Things That Go Bump In The Night

Starring:
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale, Don Warrington.

With:
Gay Rose as Brenda; Norman Bird as Vicar; 
David Rowlands as The Curate, Gordon.

Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 19th December 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.

Summary:
Rigsby's ghost story backfires on him.

Scene Guide:  
- Brenda and Alan return from a night at the cinema. Brenda sneaks upstairs as Rigsby hunts for his torch to see who is at the front door.
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- Inside, talk turns to movies after Alan says he has just been to see Dr. Zhivago. Rigsby says he watches plenty of films on television - and names half a dozen horror films. Alan insists that says something about Rigsby's mind, but Rigsby says he believes in the paranormal, whereas Alan is an unbeliever.
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- On returning to his room, Alan is questioned by Philip about his night of potential passion with Brenda. It turns out Alan only gave Brenda a peck on her cheek, and she thought that was Alan's ice lolly. Rigsby then plays a practical joke on Alan by wearing a fake werewolf's hairy hand and petrifying Alan in the process. Hearing Philip's return up the stairs, Rigsby dons a monster mask, but Philip is not taken in, and tells Rigsby to change his soap instead. Rigsby tells the boys about The Grey Lady which supposedly haunts the property and, after he has gone, Philip has an idea. He pulls out a long, old-fashioned grey dress which he bought for a fancy dress party, and persuades Alan to wear it to frighten Rigsby in revenge for his scare tactics earlier.
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- Rigsby has called in on Brenda, who is making a bedtime cup of coffee. She hears a wailing moan in the corridor and Rigsby reluctantly investigates.
- He meets Alan dressed as The Grey Lady on the stairs, and flees in panic. Alan goes in to see Brenda.
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- Philip has covered Alan's bed with cushions and a blanket, to give the impression he is asleep when he is actually with Brenda. Rigsby enters, still petrified, and asks Philip if he has had a woman back to his room. When Rigsby describes The Grey Lady, Philip says it doesn't sound like 'his type'. Rigsby remembers Brenda and thinks she may be in danger, so sets off down the stairs warily, to check on her.
- Alan, meanwhile, has just said goodnight to Brenda and has put his grey dress back on.
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- Rigsby and Alan/Grey Lady once more meet on the stairs, and Rigsby runs off twice as fast. Philip calms him down and they go to see Brenda.
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- Alan has had to hide in the room and is behind a floor-length curtain near the kitchen area. Philip decides to hold a seance, in case The Grey Lady is trying to contact Rigsby. Philip, Brenda and Rigsby sit on the settee and hold hands. Philip conducts the seance, with his questions being answered by Alan, hiding at the back of the room. Rigsby refuses to believe it is authentic, claiming there must be a tape recorder hidden behind the curtain. When he pulls the curtain back, however, he is confronted with Alan/The Grey Lady yet again, and disappears down the stairs even faster.
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- The next night, Rigsby is in his room reading an Edgar Allen Poe collection of horror stories, when he hears a noise outside his door. He opens the door quickly and holds two candlesticks in the shape of a crucifix, only to be presented with the appearane of the local vicar, whom Rigsby has requested to exorcise the building. When the vicar learns of his request, however, he tries to talk Rigsby out of it.
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- Later, Rigsby goes to Alan and Philip's room, but it is empty. He discovers Alan's pile of cushions under his blanket and realises exactly what's been going on, especially when he finds the grey dress under the sink. He has an idea.
- Meanwhile in Brenda's room, Alan and Brenda's smooching is interrupting by the vicar and the curate, complete with camera, who have come to get evidence of Rigsby's 'ghost'. Suddenly, there is a banging and wailing on the landing. As the door opens and the camera flash goes off, it is Rigsby, who is pretending to be The Grey Lady. The vicar and curate walk out in disgust.
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Script Excerpt:
- "There's nothing wrong with my mind, mate."
 

 

See Also: Series Two Photo Gallery
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(c) Paul Fisher
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